It’s easy to treat others well. But treating ourselves well is a different story. Most of us don’t. We constantly abuse ourselves. We treat ourselves poorly. Most of all, we don’t even love ourselves.
We all have heard the old age saying, “Treat others how you want to be treated.” The same principle applies to how we treat ourselves.
“How you treat yourself is how others will treat you.”
When you don’t make yourself a priority, neglect your needs or make excuses for not advocating for yourself, it becomes easier and easier to do the same for others. You open the door to feeling like a victim.
How you treat yourself when no one’s around you reinforces your belief about who you are. And what you believe is what you are.
If you abuse yourself, you also tolerate someone who humiliates you and treats you badly. Why? Because it’s normal for you. Because you do it every day to yourself.
You say to yourself, “I deserve it. I’m not good enough.”
When you make an agreement with yourself that you are not good enough, you unconsciously let others dictate your life.
When you constantly put yourself down, apologize for everything, and feel like a failure, people see this as an opportunity to take advantage of.
On the other hand, if you love yourself, take care, believe in your abilities, and are confident in who you are people will follow suit.
Why is it so hard to treat ourselves well?
One of the reasons why we find challenging to even practice the act of self-love is because we have learned to live in order to satisfy the demands of other people. We live with the fear of not being accepted and of not being good enough for someone else.
We create an image of a perfect idea of who we should be in order to be accepted by our loved ones. We crave that perfection. Perfection that’s nothing more than an illusion.
Since we are not perfect, we reject ourselves. We think we are not good enough because we don’t fit the image of the perfection we have in our minds.
Having an image of what it means to be perfect and not measuring up to that idol makes us miserable. We don’t accept ourselves the way we are.
But the truth is that there’s no such thing as perfection. You are already the best. What makes you different is your superpower. The only thing life demands from you is self-love and everything else will fall into place.
The way you treat yourself sets a standard for others
You can’t expect someone else to respect and value you if you don’t show them that you have worth by treating yourself with love, kindness and compassion.
Your worth is much more than you think. There’s no reason for settling in less than what you deserve.
Treating yourself well with love and respect creates a rippling effect. You unconsciously clarify what you are, what you accept, and what you don’t. In other words, you set standards for yourself.
And when you refuse to be treated with anything less than yourself, some people might leave. It might even feel discomfort able but don’t let that discourage you. Know that life never improves being in the comfort zone. That discomfort is a sign that your life is improving.
If you want to be treated well, treat yourself well first.
If you want others to value your time, first do it yourself.
If you want others to look at you differently, first do it yourself.